Of Things I Will Not Miss and Things I Have Found Challenging

It's now 2018. Another year has come and gone and we now look ahead to new challenges and surprises waiting for us. In recognition of leaving behind '17 and charging ahead into '18, I want to reflect on one of the most monumental changes I've ever undertaken, which took place this year: my reception into the Orthodox Church. Converting from Evangelical Protestantism to Orthodoxy is not an easy process, many things in your mind must be re-evaluated, you must learn to put "difficult to understand things" in boxes and continue to forge ahead, trusting that at some point these difficult things will make sense. But converting to Orthodoxy is not simply a matter of moving towards something - I left behind something as well. My entire life I have identified as a Protestant Christian - and that is something I have taken very seriously. I have studied and learned from various protestant groups different from my Baptist home - most notably within the Anabaptist tradition - and I sought to understand as much as I could in order to become a better Protestant. When I was in the process of studying Orthodoxy, much of my Protestant experiences I had to re-evaluate. Some things were hard to leave... Other things, not so hard. What I want to do today is briefly outline the 17 things about Evangelical Protestantism that I will not miss in honour of leaving 2017 behind, and then outline the 18 things about Orthodoxy that I have found challenging and difficult to accept in honour of the year of challenges that lay before us all.

Here we go...

17 Things About (Evangelical) Protestantism That I Will Not Miss

1. Emotionalism - Worship experiences in evangelical Protestantism seem to be equivalent to how emotional one gets. Whether it happens during singing, or praying, your "closeness" to God can be measured through how emotional you can get.
2. Ignorance of Church History - Great amounts of time are taken to understand biblical history. Up until the end of the book of Acts. After that, however, everything else is either seen with suspicion, or simply not at all. Growing up I never heard of Clement of Rome or Ignatius or Polycarp - men whose lives overlapped those of the apostles and who left us writings to read. These men and all other men and women after them are simply lost to history from a Protestant perspective.
3. Lack of Connectedness - Because of an ignorance of church history, Protestants are not connected with anyone in the past. When I was a protestant, our congregation had "sister" churches - other congregations with which we held an affinity of doctrine and practice, but that was the extent of it. We couldn't look back in history and read the lives and struggles of the saints of the church throughout the ages because we never knew about them. There was the apostles, and then there was us. Nobody in between.
4. Lack of Understanding of Most Doctrine - Because emotionalism becomes the primary form of worship, there is a great lack of understanding not only the doctrines of the faith, but also the importance of these doctrines. It is almost said with pride "Our church doesn't stress doctrine". Doctrine is seen as divisive. And yeah, it is. Because...
5. Everyone is their own Authority - The highest goal of any congregant sitting in the pew and listening to the sermon is to question everything and take nothing the pastor says at face value, but to go home and scrutinize everything he says. "Take this away and meditate on it - don't take my word for it. Let the Holy Spirit teach you". Each individual is their own authority when it comes to matters of doctrine and practice. This leads to...
6. Not knowing the beliefs of those in the pew next to me - Because we can all just decide for ourselves what the Bible says and what is good and right for us to believe, I have no idea what the person next to me believes. Do we believe the same thing about salvation? baptism? the Lord's supper? Who knows. There is actually not really a venue for even finding out, short of asking them directly. The "unity" which we experience becomes simply an emotional one on a Sunday morning.
7. Dynamic Doctrines - Because everyone is free to decide on their own what doctrines to believe, the protestant church will adopt different doctrines as time goes on. This is how we have the situation we do now: female pastors, LGBTQ pastors, gay marriage, even abortion becomes normal. How do we survive in a world like this? Hint: the answer is not "we just have to read the Bible more".
8. The Sermon - Don't get me wrong - I enjoy listening to sermons, but after I heard Orthodox homilies that were straight and to the point and were 10-15 minutes long, the 45 - 60 minute protestant sermon that gave the same information - if not less - seems unnecessary. We flower it up because we think that more time spent means more information given. This is not necessarily the case. I have preached a fair number of Protestant sermons in my life and my average length was probably around 45 minutes. The last sermon I ever preached in a Protestant setting was a condensed 25 minute sermon because we had time constraints that morning. That was the most well-received sermon I ever preached. People don't need/want long sermons if you can say the same thing in a short amount of time.
9. Contemporary Worship Songs - The focus of most contemporary worship songs seems to be us rather than God. God is usually praised because what he's done for us. Songs speak of how we are free, how we are saved, what we gain from God, which is not bad, but is not worship. And there are many songs which don't seem to have much depth to them at all. Singing a chorus of "Yes, Lord, Yes, Lord, Yes, Yes, Lord" doesn't stack up to worship - in my mind, anyway.
10. The Charismatic Movement - My own church was caught up in this in the mid-90's, and there are still people who long for it today. I myself was involved in it as a young teenager and was led astray by it. I am so thankful I don't have to deal with this anymore, that I don't have to explain it away or defend it.
11. Questions about Baptism - One of the most fundamental teachings of Christ, something that we are all called to follow in, is the doctrine of Baptism. You'd think Protestants could all agree on something so fundamental. Namely: what does it accomplish and how to administer it. Yup, no such consent exists. Each congregation will have their own beliefs about it and simply put up with others' beliefs, when they are aware of the differences. It seems to me, however, that many Protestants are not actually aware that some Protestant groups (Lutherans, Anglicans, certain type Presbyterians) actually do baptize infants.
12. End-Times Madness - Ah, the tumultuous doctrine that is Protestant Eschatology. Dispensationalism, Pre/Post Tribulation Rapture, Pre/Post Millennialism. Won't miss this confusion at all.
13. Head-Centric/Heart-Centric, no middle ground - During my life as a Protestant, I came across two kinds of people: those who "got a lot out of" the worship time, and those who "got a lot out of" the sermon. The singing was completely aimed at one's heart, and the sermon was completely aimed at one's head. There is no middle ground. Either I use my entire heart, or I use my entire head. I learned that there are switches in my brain that I needed to turn on/off depending on what part of the service I was in. Nothing encompassed everything.
14. Dispensationalism - The fact that God has a plan for the Jews that is separate from the rest of the world, that there will be a rapture that takes the Church out of the way so God can continue to deal with the Jews as a separate entity. An insistence on a literal understanding of Revelation - all things that didn't exist 220 years ago. These are the kinds of things that happen when you unleash a Bible to the world and tell people to interpret it for themselves.
15. Endless talk about Spiritual Gifts - Spiritual gifts are important, but it seems to be the evangelical trend to continuously talk about them ad nauseum. Listing them, evaluating which of them you possess, taking tests to determine which ones you exhibit. Entire Bible study series based only on Spiritual Gifts. I think what bothered me most about it was the fact that it was a way which we could focus solely on ourselves and not on God. What gifts do I have? Keep asking that and you'll lose sight of a lot of other important things.
16. Sola Scriptura - The fact that the Bible contains everything God intended us to know regarding faith and practices. The fact that we simply need to study harder to learn what He is trying to say. Oh, there's a plethora of beliefs about baptism? Just study harder. The most important thing in the world becomes the text of scripture, and with that, the study of Textual Criticism (that is the science behind reconstructing the original words of scripture) becomes the highest form of spiritual pursuit (except that it's a totally secular subject undertaken by non-believers most of the time). If there's a doctrine we need to believe, we must prove it using the Bible alone. Nothing else. At all. Nobody cares what the Christians were believing and practicing in the next generation after the Apostles - it doesn't matter - we need to focus our entire attention on the Bible. Ok, my rant is over...
17. Greeting Time - This is not applicable to all Protestant congregations, but in the middle of the service, between the heart-based singing time and the cerebral-lecture that is the sermon, often times sits a small windows of time where congregants greet one another. In my experience this time often brings with it utter chaos. Loud conversations and laughter, a time to stretch back and cast off any bit of reverence you might have built up during the singing time. It is utterly disruptive to any continuity of worship between the singing and the sermon.

Phew! Ok, that was a big list. To look ahead to the challenges of 2018, here are the 18 things I have found most difficult and unnerving about my experience as an Orthodox Christian so far.

18 Things About Othodoxy That I Have Found Challenging to Accept

1. Praying to Saints - I put this one at the top of the list because it was an explanation as to why praying to saints is not the worst thing someone could do by a Roman Catholic apologist that opened the doors for my investigation into Orthodoxy. As a protestant, this doesn't make any sense and is often confused with ascribing a god-like power to the Saints. Also allegations of necromancy are used. Coming from this point of view, this was one of the early hurdles I had to clear.
2. The Veneration of Mary - Praying to saints is one thing, but if there's one thing that every Protestant knows, it's that "Mary was definitely a normal person who was no different than you or I. She was only a virgin up until Jesus' birth and then she definitely had sexual relations with Joseph, producing more children. She was no more holy or special than anyone else and God could have chosen just about anybody for the task He gave to her." Actually seeing Mary as Ever-Virgin, more honourable than the Cherubim and beyond compare more glorious than the Seraphim was difficult for me. Praying to her in this role was very awkward at first. It took several years before I finally began to understand the importance of her role.
3. Kissing Icons - I actually never struggled with the idea of icons. As soon as I began to look into Orthodoxy I bought some icons as fast as I could. Kissing them has been a different story. I still don't understand the veneration of the icon, and kissing a block of wood seems an awkward thing to do. Interestingly it is more difficult for me to kiss an icon when I am by myself than when in a crowded nave.
4. Now and Ever and Unto Ages of Ages Amen - The traditional ending to many of the prayers we pray was difficult to do at first. I think the reason for this is the phrase "ages of ages" - something I was not used to as a protestant. At first, when I read that I thought to myself "What are these ages they are talking about? Some kind of New Age? New age stuff is bad."
5. Sacramental Understanding of the World - In Protestantism, especially Evangelicalism, God's grace works in the individual and the world through unseen events. I worship God in my mind. Nothing physical is any more sacred than anything else physical. Because of the protestant reaction to the supposed Roman Catholic doctrine of salvation by works, everything God does through salvation is only done in the unseen realm. Everything Christ taught us to do becomes only symbolic. A sacramental understanding of the world recognizes that God gives grace through the means of physical objects and acts. This was a difficult thing to recognize at first because my first thought was "What if I don't have those physical objects handy? Or what if I'm unable to perform that physical act?" I have since learned that these thoughts are not required because God is ultimately in control of everything, but that still leaves sacred acts and physical objects that are conduits to God. Still a very strange thing for a life-long protestant.
6. Baptismal Regeneration - I never even knew baptism could be anything other than symbolic. I was taught that baptism is simply a public declaration of your rational decision to follow Christ. That's it. It's a good idea to be baptised, but your salvation is not depended on it, so you can actually forego it if you don't want to. Nobody will actually say this, but that is the logical next step. To discover that the waters of baptism actually regenerate the believer and washes away his sins was a monumental leap for me.
7. Infant Baptism - Because baptism for me as an Evangelical Protestant was a public declaration of a rational decision I made, it was impossible to honestly baptize an infant because the infant has not yet made a rational decision to follow Christ, so what is the point of baptizing him? It doesn't actually do anything you know... or so I was always taught. (see #6)
8. Confession - Confessing to Christ in the presence of my priest and hearing his prayer of absolution over me is still strange. I grew up thinking any such thing was Roman Catholic nonsense and we can just go to Christ ourselves - why require a confessional visit? As it turns out, going to confession is a wonderful thing, something practiced by the Church since Her infancy, and is actually healing. It was a bit of a challenge at first, but the more I do it, the more natural it becomes.
9. The Apocrypha - I had read a good chunk of the apocrypha as a Protestant because I was curious about it. At the same time I educated myself on why it is good and right that the apocrypha is not part of the Bible. I had to abandon those reasons when I became orthodox. It's still a bit difficult for me to consider 1st and 2nd Maccabees as canonical as 1st and 2nd Samuel.
10. The Septuagint - The Orthodox canon has even more books than the Roman Catholics: Psalm 151, 3rd Maccabees, and the Prayer of Manasseh. This is still hard for me to wrap my head around. The reason for the inclusion of these books is because the Orthodox hold the Septuagint to be the best version of the Old Testament because it was the version used the Apostles and the early church. As a Protestant I was told that the Septuagint was a terrible translation of the Hebrew into Greek  good only for academic curiosity. What those who make that claim fail to realize is that it would be categorized as a terrible translation of the Masoretic Text, but there is good evidence that it was translated from a different manuscript - possibly something more ancient. But regardless of the facts, the Church uses it and honours it above the Masoretic Text and I have had to deal with it.
11. A Less-Hostile View of Roman Catholicism - As a protestant I was suspicious of everything that looked Roman Catholic. Roman Catholics were wrong because they prayed to saints, venerated Mary, baptized infants, believed strange things about the Eucharist, etc. Now that I'm Orthodox, most of the things I criticized Catholics for are now things I am learning to accept. The list of things that I no longer agree with is a lot smaller, and the overall view of Roman Catholicism is seen with much less suspicion in Orthodox circles. Sure, there's still the Pope, purgatory, and the immaculate conception that we don't agree with, but there's a lot more that we do... It's still a process for me.
12. Eucharistic Fast - The Eucharistic fast on Sunday mornings has taken time to become normal for me. Basically no food or water before church on Sunday. The Eucharist is the first substance that we partake on Sundays. I enjoy my morning coffee and leisurely breakfasts. Giving them up on Sundays has been challenging.
13. Fasts - Fasting from olive oil, meat, dairy, and basically all animal products every Wednesday and Friday has been... interesting. Not that we ate that much meat before, but it's been a bit of a challenge as we have to plan our suppers around fast days. Several times throughout the year Orthodox fast from certain foods for an extended period of time. Since I've only been Orthodox for 110 days, I've only had the opportunity to participate in the Nativity Fast - the 40 days before Christmas. It seems easy to do, but it's rather difficult at times.
14. Relics - The bone fragments of deceased saints. Every Orthodox church has them embedded in the altar. Many pilgrimages are made each year by Orthodox faithful to venerate the relics of deceased saints. Some skulls have even been known to produce a sweet-smelling oil, and have been the source of miraculous healings. The protestant in me cries out "Why! This is complete nonsense! What power do dead bones have? This is some sort of evil wizardry!" But it's the reality in the Orthodox world. Oh, it's also in the Bible, too (2 Kings 13:21).
15. Salvation - The protestant (and Roman Catholic) understanding of salvation is entirely judicial. We are declared innocent (even though we are not) through Christ's sacrifice, which appeases the wrath of Almighty God. The Orthodox understanding of Salvation is rather different: it's based on the Incarnation being the most important aspect, not the sacrifice of His death. Yes, there is a judicial aspect to Salvation, but it's not the entirety of it, nor even the majority. There is no wrath of God to be appeased in Orthodox soteriology. I am still wrapping my head around this one.
16. Praying for the dead - Yup, not only do we pray to deceased saints, we actually pray for deceased brethren. We pray that God would forgive them of every sin, and remember them. The eternal state of someone is not changed after death, but for the Orthodox, that's no reason to stop praying for each other.
17. Constantine is a canonized saint - As a protestant familiar with church history I knew of Constantine and his role in the first ecumenical council. I also learned that he couldn't figure out if Arianism was correct or not even after the council. I also learned that he postponed baptism until his deathbed, and even then he was baptized by an Arian. The Roman Catholics have not canonized him a saint, but the Orthodox have. It makes me uncomfortable. This has not become easier to accept yet. It's going to take some more time.
18. Snakes on the Bishop's staff - I admit I hate the fact that Orthodox bishops walk around with staffs that have two intertwining snakes on them. To me a snake represents evil. I understand that there is a reason and a purpose behind it. It symbolizes the power of God present through Moses and the miracle of the staff becoming a serpent in ancient Egypt. This article does a good job explaining why these symbols are used. But it still makes me uncomfortable.

Phew, again! Those are 18 things I have had difficulty with in my short life as an Orthodox Christian. Converting to Orthodoxy has been a monumental undertaking for me - something I desire everyone would consider in spite of the difficulties. At the very least understand that a significant part of the Christian world for the last two millennia has not been Protestant. The early Church wasn't Protestant. The writers of the New Testament weren't Protestant. Even though there are things in Orthodoxy that makes the Protestant in me tremble with anxiety, there is so much depth, wisdom, beauty, and all-round solidarity within it that the anxieties are eventually replaced with feelings of safety and peace.

You may not become Orthodox in 2018, but do some study, ask some questions, visit an Orthodox Church perhaps... There is a lot more to our Christian faith than what the Protestant West has given us. I encourage you to look deeply at your own faith and evaluate your own beliefs in light of ancient Christianity.